Vacation Is Upon Us? Hard to Tell.

Ah yes, vacation is upon us.  Well, at least for teachers and students and the such...unless you have children, than it's really just like changing professions for a few months.  From parent/worker to PARENT. In reality, if you have ever wanted to know how many times someone can say your name in one day..."Dad, Dad, Dad..." than spend a rainy day at home with your kiddos.  It can be a fun game to play..."How many times will my children say (Mom or Dad) in the next hour?"  Let the good times roll!  Furthermore, on vacations such as this one, where we are getting rainy day after rainy day here in New England, it's hard to say who gets more frustrated with each other...me with the kids...or the kids with me.  But, that's love.

In all reality, this has been an interesting vacation so far.  Once school ended I was able to go on a nice four day vacation with my wife to Bar Harbor...just the two of us.  It is always strange when you go somewhere without the kids.  At dinner you feel odd eating in silence, you don't have to pick up as many spills or messes, and you don't have to apologize to the waitress for your son calling her "a butthole."  When we walked through the streets of Bar Harbor (I realize when I write it like that it sounds like the "MEAN STREETS" of Bar Harbor...which couldn't be farther from the truth) however, when we walk along the road we can freely walk into any store, or establishment, and not have to worry about a stroller fitting in the aisles, being bugged to "buy something", having to pick up children and put them down on a whim, and we almost never have to apologize to a stranger for asking an extremely inappropriate question...like the time my son saw a man with an eye patch and said, "Hey, are you a pirate?"  Or when my kids, both have at one point or another, point out (very loudly I might add) that a person is...shall we say...Gerthy.  That's a proud parental moment. Regardless, my lovely wife and I *almost* felt guilty shopping, chatting, walking, eating and resting...almost.

While we were there we had several great experiences and some very interesting sights, sounds and actions that we took part in.  First, mini golf.  We love it. We are competitive.  My wife trash talked me on Facebook prior us leaving; however, I will say that my record while we were down there this time was 3-0-1..that is 3 wins, no losses and 1 tie. However, golf etiquette is something that not many people have, I have come to realize.  Just like the one person that is always driving slowly in the right lane, there is always someone who is playing incredibly slowly...a group of...let's say 9 (when it clearly says no more than 5 in a group) of several young teenagers and their parents.  It really doesn't help when one of these people is the most uncoordinated individuals I have ever seen.  I mean, golfers are typically not accused of being Overly Athletic very often, however; it was difficult to watch...and when me and Julie could finish one hole in 45 seconds, and it took than 5 minutes...we had plenty of time to watch. I could have written my dissertation on, "How watching sad, pathetic golfing can cause sadness, despair, anxiety and depression in those that view from a short distance."  Regardless, mini-golf is a lot of fun and I was victorious...often.

Another one of our favorite passtimes when we are in Bar Harbor is to walk the Shore Path, that is 1.1 miles along the immediate, rocky coast of Bar Harbor.  It has scenic views of the water, Porquipine Islands on the left, and the 40 + room "Cottages" on your right.  You also get to do a great deal of people watching when you walk along the shore path.  We were able to see the young couple with 3...count em...3 young girls. I would say they were all under the age of 4.  I really think two of them were twins...maybe 10-12 months old.  All screaming, the parents looking as calm and collected as two sleep deprived, dehydrated, stressed out individuals could look.  You have my sympathies. You do.

During this walk I also saw one of the saddest, yet most appropriate and oddly sweet things I have ever seen.  As we slowly, confidently and leisurely walked along the path after our delicious breakfast (Julie eating Banana/Creme Brule Pancakes, and me with a Lobster/Aged Cheddar Omelet...yes, I was off my diet and exercise program for the 4 days...go me...and the 5 pounds I gained in 4 days.), we came across a woman, quite lovely, taking what I would consider to be her morning run.  She has the full get-up of exercise shirt, yoga pants, running shoes, sunglasses and ipod attached to her left arm.  She had the grace of a runner and the strides of someone confident in their abilities...she had not a care in the world.  Behind her....about 20 yards or so, was her husband.  On his feet were a pair of New Balance shoes so new I think they still had the brown paper on the inside of them.  Instead of yoga pants, he had on a pair of Khaki shorts with a beautiful woven belt and on his torso...you guessed it....a polo shirt...and not even one of the polo's with a breathable material...this baby was 100% cotton.  Think of a nice, American Eagle, thick bodied polo shirt...this guy was sporting it.  Unfortunately for him, he didn't pick a dark enough color, for his moobie sweat was soaking through his shirt.  And unlike his wife's inaudible breaths...the calm and powerful lungs that a runner possesses...he was gasping for air like a child does when they first learn to swim and they try to dive all the way to the bottom of the pool and swim from one end of the in ground pool to the other....you all know the feeling, and more importantly, the sound that that situation creates.  He also had no ipod. I don't think he would have heard it over the sound of his own breathing, or his thoughts of how much he hated his life at that particular moment.  However, I'm sure he was doing it to try to what he could to share more time with his wife...to find a common ground...something they could both enjoy together.  For that, I have respect and admiration. We've all been there buddy.  For me, it's shopping...for him...it's running.

Our trip was great.  It's always nice to have a few moments away from the kids, to have time for your spouse and you to reconnect, relax, and recharge. That is a tip for all fathers and husbands.  I don't have much advice in that department, very often at least, but that is something I feel very confident in sharing and advising. 

The rest of my vacation is still to be had.  However, I leave tomorrow for a fun filled education conference in the great Washington DC.  It's always nice to get down to DC...with it's extreme heat, humidity and busy streets...the history is amazing and beautiful.  However, conferences...they are hit or miss.  I have high hopes.  Anyway, it is nice to be back home for now...time to spend with the kids...playing every sport possible, talking about Angry Birds, watching cartoons, letting them eat junk food, staying up too late and hugging, kissing and cuddling on the couch. 

Summer vacation.  I like it.

Julie and I at the Mini-Golf course.

Julie after her first hole-in-one.

Dad...AKA "Buckwheat".

Ahhhhh...the weekend. A time to rest, relax, kick back and...well, in all honesty I couldn't lie any longer without feeling dirty or busting out laughing. Although the weekends are a break from the monetary and stress of the work week; it comes with it's own quirks and ...well in my case, as with many of you out there...children. AKA "The Wildcard".  Children are no less predictable than a Charlie Huff knuckleball (look him up if you need to), the weather in Maine, or the difference between what you order at a McDonald's drive thru and what you actually get in your bag when you drive off. This weekend was, of course, no exception.  In between the nine...yes...I counted...nine loads of laundry that I folded and put away and the countless dishes washed (we somehow manage to dirty like 4 plates per day...but like, 38 pieces of silverware and 22 coffee mugs), I managed to have my fair share of weird, semi-aggravating, confusing, hilarious moments with my two lovely kids this weekend...who are now 3 and 6 respectively.

My daughter, ever the lady, is pretty good at keeping herself entertained. Whether she is playing on her Kindle Fire, drawing pictures, writing words, or using her imagination to create an Angry Birds world in our toy room that would make Tim Burton jealous, she is a pretty great, smart, intelligent and funny kiddo.  However, lately, and I don't know if I should blame school, her mother, me or...tv...?  But, she has been getting sassy lately...and I mean, teenage sassy.  Today she said, "Dad, can  you get me a drink."  I responded with, "Ry, you know where the Capri Suns are...they are in the office, go help yourself sweetie."  To which she came back with, "But you're my dad, isn't that your job?"  She was not kidding. She didn't even look up from her Kindle. In that instant I saw myself in about 10-12 years...it was scary. Like, wake up in the middle of the night...cold, flop sweat kind of scary. However, she is really a good, responsible girl...for the most part. I will remind myself that I said that when she is 16 or so.

Rivers on the other hand...I'm not really sure how to explain our relationship. I love him...he, within one minute, loves, detests, tolerates, ignores, needs, seeks, shadows, hates, admires and pities me. Not that I necessarily blame him. While Rylee proved herself to be sweet (most of the time) Rivers has become a sidekick of sorts. The go-to laugh factory. He spent most of his time walking through the house kicking things saying, "I'm Grumpy."...driving his Power Wheel 4-wheeler (Spiderman Edition) into everything in the house, mostly on purpose.  He has gotten to a point where the animals in the house have begun to hide at the first sound of the 2 horsepower engine firing up.  If that wasn't enough, he has decided to bestow upon me a nickname. While he decided to bypass such great names as, "Dad", "Daddy", "Cool Dude", "Sweet Sassy Molassie" and "Grampa Joe"...he has gone straight to..."Buckwheat". Yes, my 3 year old son has decided to call his father...Buckwheat. As in, "Hey Rivers, time to brush your teeth."..."Ok, Buckwheat." I do love my son...and even though the nickname is something I wish he'd forget...It definitely makes him a character. That makes me a proud Buckwheat.

On a last note, this weekend I said goodbye to the Spruce Mountain High School - South Campus class of 2013. Graduation was interesting...not that I expected anything different. They were/are a unique group that I have grown very fond of in the last four years. I have traveled to England, France, Ireland, Wales, and New York City with them...I have had them in numerous classes and had tons of talks with them...honest, sincere, stern, heartwarming, goofy, hilarious and deep talks. I will miss them tremendously. Don't get me wrong, at times they drove me crazy...I'm sure they think the same about me.  However, that is the true hallmark of a close-knit group...a family. When you have disagreements, but still admire and respect each other...it's a glorious thing.

To the class of 2013...my advice is in honor of my daughter Rylee and her kindergarten class.  They have Bee's that are color coded.  Green is good, orange is not so good and Red is bad.  I have my own list of "Be's" for you in the future... Be good. Be safe. Be brave. Be yourselves. Be atypical. Be kind. Be sincere. Be loving. Be open to other cultures. Be silly. Be there for each other. Be healthy. Be generous with your time, talents, patience, and grace. Be good to your parents, siblings, family and friends. Be afraid...but let the fear push you harder. Be creative. Be forever from a small town. Be gracious in defeat and success. Be willing to listen to others...sometimes thats all someone needs to get them through the day.  Be humble but be willing to share your talents. Be always in touch. Be an adult...but always be a child...and above all else...be happy...always be happy. I will miss you all. I will always be there for you...I hope you all know that.

Buckwheat. Out.